After the Sun Goes Down
First of all, Happy Easter, to those of you who celebrate that.
Within the past few weeks, I've been coming back to a question that I really thought I wouldn't have to ask again: Where am I going to college? The problem is this: Because my entire family is moving to Florida, residency/tuition remains a constant issue, because I/we cannot afford college. The other problem is this: My admittance to UCF (University of Central Florida) was accepted about a month ago, but I did not qualify for the competitive institutional scholarships because I applied just a tad too late (which pisses me off because it means that I would've qualified had I applied much earlier; my academic criteria exceeds the minimal requirements). Plus, my parents just recently (as in within the last day or two) decided to move into my mom's grandmother's old home, located in Port St. Lucie. That's located at least two hours away from UCF, which is in Orlando. So, not only would I face the issue of out-of-state tuition and lack of financial aid (of which I have yet to receive), the issue of location has also come up. What grinds my gears is that my choice of college was already set in stone before my mom moved down to find us a house. Two hours is too far - I'd most likely have to come up with $9,000+ additional for housing even then. I barely make enough money to pay for car insurance (which went up in the last month as you might figure).
School hasn't exactly been much help, but I've come not to expect much from that anymore. What options are left? I don't want to be the guy that just settles. Over a year ago, I had ideas to attend Florida State University - this was way before my parents decided to move down there. Granted, FSU wasn't exactly my top pick, but obviously I improvised between now and then. Am I just supposed to pick a college close to me that's affordable? I don't even know where that's going to be. Port St. Lucie is the city that my mom's grandmother's home was in (she is no longer alive). If I'm going to move to a place that's far away from everyone and everything I know (which, mind you, I'm more than happy to comply with), I want to be able to see that there's going to be something new - that something is going to be different. I mean, I'm going to have to quit my job within the next few weeks, which I don't want to do as I just got promoted. I also met a lot of wonderful people there - people who actually aren't judgmental and cruel. And, while I've neglected to consider any of them "friends" (since a personal relationship dynamic doesn't really exist), I have no doubt that some of them could have been people I'd want to keep in contact - you know, if I wasn't moving three states away.
So, after the sun goes down and all is said and done, what is the end result? What can I sit down and say I've accomplished for the day? There's a beautiful quote from somewhere that I can't remember, but it goes like this: "If you wait to do everything for everyone, instead of doing something for someone, you'll end up doing nothing for no one." All grammar Nazism aside, the point is real - I shouldn't put anything I do now aside just because I'm moving away forever. I shouldn't shut good people out just because I may never see them again - ever. There are still good people in the world, and I can't wait to meet them wherever I go. I really don't know where I am headed, but circumstances have proven that a difficult problem to fix. Is there good news? Well, I've adapted to a philosophy that every situation has a bright side. So, in terms, sure - there is good news. The good news would be that no matter what happens, I'm still getting out of here.
Thank you for taking time out of your day to read this message.
Within the past few weeks, I've been coming back to a question that I really thought I wouldn't have to ask again: Where am I going to college? The problem is this: Because my entire family is moving to Florida, residency/tuition remains a constant issue, because I/we cannot afford college. The other problem is this: My admittance to UCF (University of Central Florida) was accepted about a month ago, but I did not qualify for the competitive institutional scholarships because I applied just a tad too late (which pisses me off because it means that I would've qualified had I applied much earlier; my academic criteria exceeds the minimal requirements). Plus, my parents just recently (as in within the last day or two) decided to move into my mom's grandmother's old home, located in Port St. Lucie. That's located at least two hours away from UCF, which is in Orlando. So, not only would I face the issue of out-of-state tuition and lack of financial aid (of which I have yet to receive), the issue of location has also come up. What grinds my gears is that my choice of college was already set in stone before my mom moved down to find us a house. Two hours is too far - I'd most likely have to come up with $9,000+ additional for housing even then. I barely make enough money to pay for car insurance (which went up in the last month as you might figure).
School hasn't exactly been much help, but I've come not to expect much from that anymore. What options are left? I don't want to be the guy that just settles. Over a year ago, I had ideas to attend Florida State University - this was way before my parents decided to move down there. Granted, FSU wasn't exactly my top pick, but obviously I improvised between now and then. Am I just supposed to pick a college close to me that's affordable? I don't even know where that's going to be. Port St. Lucie is the city that my mom's grandmother's home was in (she is no longer alive). If I'm going to move to a place that's far away from everyone and everything I know (which, mind you, I'm more than happy to comply with), I want to be able to see that there's going to be something new - that something is going to be different. I mean, I'm going to have to quit my job within the next few weeks, which I don't want to do as I just got promoted. I also met a lot of wonderful people there - people who actually aren't judgmental and cruel. And, while I've neglected to consider any of them "friends" (since a personal relationship dynamic doesn't really exist), I have no doubt that some of them could have been people I'd want to keep in contact - you know, if I wasn't moving three states away.
So, after the sun goes down and all is said and done, what is the end result? What can I sit down and say I've accomplished for the day? There's a beautiful quote from somewhere that I can't remember, but it goes like this: "If you wait to do everything for everyone, instead of doing something for someone, you'll end up doing nothing for no one." All grammar Nazism aside, the point is real - I shouldn't put anything I do now aside just because I'm moving away forever. I shouldn't shut good people out just because I may never see them again - ever. There are still good people in the world, and I can't wait to meet them wherever I go. I really don't know where I am headed, but circumstances have proven that a difficult problem to fix. Is there good news? Well, I've adapted to a philosophy that every situation has a bright side. So, in terms, sure - there is good news. The good news would be that no matter what happens, I'm still getting out of here.
Thank you for taking time out of your day to read this message.
I love you, but your attitude is like that of a shrew. Your options? Take a pill or be my kill. Might I suggest that you wear a vest. Perish in class or be banished to the land of bluegrass, where dreams don't exist as you'll be eternally pissed.
