First of all, idgaf if i get 100% warning or suspension for this. This must be posted on here. If any of you flame for this i will seriously not speak to you until the end of summer. This is a message from kwill. He feels really bad for what he has done.
[Edit] I just want to say that i forgive you kwill and that I really hope you return to the forums. You will be missed greatly.
Without further ado, a message from kwill:
I went back to the forums one more time, just to read my final thread, and I can pretty much say that's about what I deserved. I have been whiny, immature, arrogant, angry, and impulsive. I overreacted to posts, which I realize were not intended to be offensive toward me. What started because of a suggestion I made to Jeff turned into a massive flame war. What I should have done is edited my original post to make it sound less accusatory, because that was not my intent. What I did do was overreact and took my anger out on certain people. I look back at all my previous posts of mine that were contributive and beneficial to the forums (for the most part) and wonder why I threw it all away for no reason at all. I was weak. I don't want this mess to be my legacy on the forums, and I know that this is the right thing to do, and the stronger thing to do.
Things have not been going my way recently in life. I had all this built-up anger and frustration from various failures in life, including PR. I understand that I was not the only one, but that doesn't make me feel much better about it. Anyway, I had all this anger and hate, and I needed a place to let it flow. And what better place is there to release anger, than the Internet? People that you don't know personally, but you know them well enough to make the hate mean something to them. That's why I did it. If you don't control your anger and your pride, then you WILL end up hated by everyone else, as I am now.
- I apologize especially to PF, Matthew, and Trace for my nasty PMs, which contained things that should never be said by anyone, under any circumstance.
- I apologize to Jeff, who has been bending over backwards to help me, and I continually hurt him.
- I apologize to Matan, for insulting your forums and your leadership. You have done an excellent job at maintaining the peace. I have not.
- I apologize to the forums as a whole. I didn't have to drag everyone into this mess. I fear there is irreparable harm done here. Forgive me.
I know I really ended my stay here on a low note, but I hope that this message can fix some of the damage caused, and I want you to realize that I am not the person you saw posting in the past few days. He was consumed by anger and pride, and it caused him to behave in a way that was not who he really was. I don't want my legacy to be the guy who freaked out over a small dispute and went too far, dragging everyone down with him. I want my legacy to be the person who recognizes his mistakes and learns from them.
Thank you for reading this far. Forgive me if you will. If you won't, well then that's your choice, not mine.
I am a programmer. Most here know me for being one of the major contributors to Marble Blast Platinum and PlatinumQuest.
I must say I'm proud of you, Kwill. It's amazing to me that flame posts can be so easy to write when in the right mood, but apology posts are so much harder to write no matter what. To see you apologize like this took a lot of courage, and that makes you a stronger person. I just wish that this had happened before you ended up deleting your account and getting everyone upset at you. I honestly do feel bad now for the things I wrote in your final blog thread, but it was how I felt at the time. This post shows that you are not the things I said you were.
Personally, I do forgive you for the things you did, and you have gained back my respect. I realize now that this was not your true personality, but rather a build-up of negative emotions inside you that finally exploded. I should have realized that from personal experience. It's going to be a long road of recovery from this incident, however, and I don't blame you for wanting to stay away for a while. I'll be here to welcome you back into the fold when you're ready.
@Jeff: I highly doubt you're going to get punished for this
I agree with Andrew. Making a flame post is one of the easiest things to do, but making an apology post, takes courage. After your blog post, I saw you as weak, but now I'm starting to see another side to you. I hope your trouble is real life go away, and you can enjoy the rest of your childhood. Bye Kwill
You don't want to know where I live and come and beat me up? But that would have been the most fun ever, seeing some pissed off kid come and try to beat up a 6 foot 2 inch 200 pound fairly muscular guy.
But in all seriousness, it's fine we all get mad at times and I had a good laugh reading that PM.