lock Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story

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01 Feb 2007 04:51 #1 by Skiiz
Ok, now here is the full, full story of Hammple the Cat and The Noglingy Forjent:





Once upon a time there was a cat named Hammple. He liked to eat marbles. Then one day he accidentally ate the defaultmarble. Now he can't play his favorite game, Marbleblast Gold! What will he do? What he did was drink cheese until his ears turned purple and skyboxes flew out his stomach. and then he died. THE END! But then he came back to life...as a ZOMBIE CAT! He then...Rode on a dragon named saphira by killing it's original owner Eragon! But then he accidentally fell off and...Decided to become a contortionist and blew up after he overcooked his salmon. Then he......vowed revenge on the salmon and their fishy brethren. So he went to sea, tartar sauce in hand, and stumbled upon an underwater civilization led by a king mackerel. He decided to...call Matan to finish the game off and Matan beat everything. Darkness Shadow failed and Hample got pissed off and bit his face off, and Darkness Shadow died a cruel horrible torture death where they nailed his feet to the ground and filled the torture room with piss drowning him with disgusting taste. Ooh too far there, lol. And then after Darkness Shadow died, Hample went off to his
SECRET NAPPING PLACE
where he went to sleep and dreamed about...Eating a magic Pickle. It was magic because he became an angel. God came up to him when he was on a cloud though, and said that it wasn't magic, it was tainted, and you are dead. He woke up, and found that he......had slept walked and was inches away from the edge of a cliff wearing a bunny suit. He was so startled that he lost his footing and fell of the cliff. Luckily...He fell on a sharp rock instead of the out-stretched hands of Luke. When he found out he had avoided Luke's grasp, he went insane with relief and...Noticed that from falling on the sharp rock, he was now split in half. Thankfully, since he was a zombie he didn't die. He then saw Luke coming after him. He couldn't run away, because he didn't have his bottom half. Luke was fast approaching, so he...decided to make an account, mbgrocks3. This drove luke insane, and he just needed the starw that broke the camels back. He made an interior that beat Lukes, and ,luke melted. He then...Saw Matan beats Marble Blast for the 1082957235178561 time. GG NO RE!

Also Luke decided that he stank as an interior maker so he decided to suicide when Tech Geek......Turned luke into a marble and pushed him down off of the level, and he fell eternally to the forest and barn below. Eternally!!! I then...Felt sorry for luke, and dived down after him [Yeah, right]. Hammple then...realized that Tech geek doesn't go after luke. He realized that Tech Geek was a Robot! Duh. His name is Tech Geek. He then...Decided to contradict Ian and post his version of what happened on a MBG forum. After that, he got carple tunnel syndrome from typing too much and retired from MBG. This caused...him to break out of Luke's mind control. He then realised that he loved MBG despite Luke's mind control, forcing him to quit MBG. So he came back. However, Luke hasn't been punished, yet, so...Ian came with a giant robot and started blowing up luke with a barrage of missles. He then took lukes head and mounted it on his wall, with a sign pointing to his head that says STUPID. And then...A piece of chalk started growing out of Luke's mutilated head and all the scientists gathered to investigate. There findings showed...That Lukes mom came for revenge and the chalk turned into her! Then an asteroid flew into the Earth and the only a CD with MBG on it survived. Lukes mom survived the asteriod, and decided to infect the CD and turn it into... MARBLE BLAST OLD!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*Everyone looking at the previous post faints* ...Luckily, Hample had hitchhiked on a nearby spacecraft just before the earth was destroyed. He spent eight years traveling the galaxy with Ford Prefect and Zaphod Beeblebrox, returned to our solar system and found out that the earth was just as he left it. Everyone told him that the asteroid was a hallucination that suddenly disappeared and asked him where he had been for so long. Confused, he settled back down, fell in love with Fenchurch, found out where all the dolphins went, and...


PS. the above is a reference to Douglas Adams (points to signature) series: the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (great books!) if you were to replace Hample with Arthur Dent and asteroid with yellow Vogan spacescraft, you would have the summary of the first four books....and non dolphin-safe tuna. All the dolphins wanted revenge on him, and they slashed some water on him. aaah!!!!! I am a cat! I can not be wet! *licks self* While licking himself, he...Suddenly had the urge to vomit, and he coughed up a furball. In that furball was...A note saying: IT'S GONNA BE A SNOW DAY TOMORROW!!!!!!!!
Next to that, there was...A message from me that says:

I'll delete my last two posts. However, I still killed Darkness Shadow with my shotgun.


Then, suddenly, the buzzer to someone's microwave goes off and everyone jumps with surprise! Marble Blast Old had been restored!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Luke, in his agony, was vaporized, and was never to be seen again on the Noglingy Forjent thread. Lukes mom died too. So Hammple took a vaction to New Jersey, and sues Delta Airlines cuz it sucked.
Everyone cheered because the planet has been released of luke's STUPIDITY! YAY! Then, Luke came back as a mentally challenged zombie [like That is any different], and then DIED because he got shot by Ian's toenail clipper. Hammple decided to seek Marble Land. He grabbed his coat, a jar of apple butter, a tie-die colored marble, and his favorite birdhouse, and he set off to settle in a cozy home to enjoy the rest of his life in Marble Land with Tech Geek. During his journey he came across a R.Stanley. He showed Hammple the world of the magic E-G-G-S. Until the eggs broke down and with the cheese it went to the sewage where they met LukeIsAlwaysAlive...and Hammple then knew something was up. It appears that luke created lots of multiple accounts and now there are about 50 lukes! Oh noes!
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01 Feb 2007 04:51 #2 by Skiiz
Oh Yes! said Luke in return.
What shall we do?! Asked the frightened Cheeseburger
What will you NOT do?! said Luke
Ummm, not be eaten by someone. came the honest reply from the Cheeseburger
Wait, you're a cheeseburger, YUM! said Luke, now running towards the Cheeseburger
AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!! shouted the Cheeseburger
Out from nowhere a moving platform came, suddenly blocking the way between Luke and the cheeseburger. Luke missed the shock absorber, and he hit the platform with such great speeds that his internal organs came out from everywhere.
DAMN! THAT WAS MY 49TH MOST FAVOURITE ACCOUNT! YOU WILL PAY FOR THIS MOVING PLATFORM, GARAGEGAMES said Luke, who was now heading towards the GarageGames Headquarters, thinking about destroying it...

As Luke arrived, a fighting scene music started...
I just had a sick idea. I'll create this as a movie in flash! Said Ian, soon as the music fighting scene started.
Alright! said Matan, now ready with his weaponary, which included a very fast moving Gyrocopter, which is now a killing machine.
BRING IT ON, BITCH!, said Luke...

And they started fighting.. Wii!

OMFG GO FUCKING HUMP A FUCKING TREE YOU N00B WHY THE FUCK YOU FIGHT THE WII YOU ASSHOLE GO DIE IN A FUCKING TREE AND FUCK YOUR MOM YOU ASSHOLE shouted Pascal, who went to defend the Wii...

OMG! LUKE IS ESCAPING shouted PerishingIce, who's Perishingflames's less cute twin brother.

And they all started running after Luke...Luke, in his surpise at this sudden upheaval, decided to create 999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999 more accounts [AAH!]...which in some quantum freak accident caused the stupidity in the universe to be raised to the power of (1/planck's constant) This dramatic sink in the average IQ caused Hample to become extremely smart; smart enough to hack and delete every one of luke's accounts. He was gone forever, and Hample, Sporlo, Tech Geek, Matan, Pascal, Pascal's Wii, Ian, moshe, rstanley, darkness shadow, PerishingIce, PerishingFlames, and everyone else had a huge party. Unfortunatly Hample's IQ lowered back to normal. Out of the ground, quietly, Luke still had his original account on GarageGames website... He still spams there regulary. But, Hample was still a hero and was granted a life supply of cheeseburgers and a title of nobility in Denmark. He thought about retiring but...He needed to the toilets before he could make such a decision...He said yes.


(1) One day Hammple met Luke again. Hammple was as shocked as Macbeth was when he saw Banquo at the banquet, so Luke , with the element of suprise, took a candycane and started to Rub it on his feet. Hammple decided to swipe the candycane from Luke. He sterilized it and then threw it away. (he thought that if he just threw it away without sterilizing it, it might attract mutated unknown viruses to the earth from far-away planets) Luke then got so mad, and he shot Hammple with a .22. But, since Luke was such a bad shot, he shot himself. While he was on the floor bleeding, the rare occurance of spontaneous combustion occured at that moment to Luke! He burst into flames, and caught Hammple on fire. Then, they started to fight, and both fell into a lake. So, then they weren't on fire anymore. Then an alien UFO came down on the lake, and it glowed a strange green color and the lake turned into an army of mutant vedgetables! The mutant tomatoes, onions, and corn walked up to them and started to stuff themselves into their mouths! Hammple and Luke then both got a terrible case of indigestion! They apologized for ever eating veggies, and barfed all of them back up. The veggies then Turned into a wonderful buffet of chinese food! Hammple set down and hapilly ate all of the Pecan Raviolis, Chicken, Baby Bokchoi, Lomain Noodles, Boneless spare ribs, beef chaofoon, and Shoved some of it into Luke's nose. Luke was too stupid to breath through his mouth, and died. The next day, while Hammple was wandering in the woods, a large sea urchin appeared attached to a tree.

(2) The sea urchin called to his alien friends, and they decided to recruit Hammple into the AFLAC. (or the Alien Forces Living At Chicago). Hammple accepted. They said in three weeks time, Hammple would start his training. When three weeks passed, Hammple was magically warped to the mystical alien training facility. He was scared and wet himself. But that was nothing compared to what he saw next. It was a bunny slipper. But not just a bunny slipper. A bunny slipper so big, he couldn't see the top. A bunny slipper of such massive proportions, it made him look like something really.... small. Hammple couldn't begin to imagine what it was doing here. The alien explained: This is the BOT, Bunny of Terror Hammple looked far off into the distance and saw an identical bunny slipper, then looked straight up and realized that it was actually a huge bunny-slipper-wearing-bunny. in order to become a member of AFLAC, you must defeat the BOT in battle Hammple was presented with a wide array of weapons to choose from: Weapons so weird that he couldn't tell what in the world each did, and picked one at random. It looked like a strange ovalish shaped thing. The alien stated, Wise choice, young Hammple. You have chosen an esteemed weapon. It is known as the...kitchen whisk. Now it is time to prove your worth. Fight the BOT!!!! Let the fight begin!! The BOT slowly lumbered towards Hammple. The cat tried to whack the BOT with the kitchen whisk. However, the BOT simply knocked it away, far away from Hammple. Then, the BOT tried to smash Hammple, but Hammple swiftly dodged, and ran to the kitchen whisk. Just as Hammple picked up the whisk, the BOT kicked him. EEEEKKK!!, Hammple screeched. The alien gasped, He said the words.... Suddenly, a golden glow came from the whisk.

(3) He realized it was a laser! Not thinking at all, he accidentally shot himself. In heaven, God decided he should give Hammple his life back. After that, at the fight, Hammple decided to make friends with the BOT. The alien said Aww, that's nice. and walked to the bathroom. Hammple and the BOT then realized that neither of them had to go to the bathroom. So they went to the kitchen to see if there were any good snacks. In the kitchen, the toaster began to talk, and it told them to put metal in it! They decided to, and they got ZAPPED! Ouch! They threw the toaster in the oven and set it to 425 degrees, and let it bake for three hours, to get revenge. After the three hours, Hammple and the BOT took the toaster out of the oven, only to find out that the toaster had morphed into a blue dragon, which then meta morphed into a purple donkey. Then it bucked BOT out a window. Hammple went for his free root canal, which he bought with his SBLOUNCKHED! bar. Then he went back the the kitchen and used his root canal to kill the donkey. He want to rescue the BOT, but before he could jump out the window, he remembered he ate all that chineese food earlier. THE GOD OF MSG CAME AND BLOCKED THE WINDOW! Then began a bloody battle between the MSG god and Hammple. The MSG god attacked Hammple and crushed his cheese coat. Hammple cried at 1674db, and destroyed the god. Hammple jumped out the window after the BOT and noticed that he couldn't hear anything. He had actually made himself deaf when he cried! (at least Hammple didn't die). Notwithstanding, Hammple dashed after BOT. He ran straight into a brick and potato wall.

(4) He then realized that this thread got to the 2 page milestone! He celebrated, and accidentally deleted all of the posts. In his desperate attempt to get them back, he realized that he had only moved them to the rubbish bin. He wanted to get them back, but Matan said he had to write a 732 page essay on why. Determined to get the posts back, Hammple kicked Matan and DEMANDED that he put the posts back. That had the unfortunate side affect of Matan banning him, and he couldn't get on the forums! Now what would he do!??!!?!? So, Hammple decided to apologize to Matan, and he felt sorry for him and let him get another account. Hammple was so relieved, that he decided to get back to the original story. The BOT was there, and was really pissed off that Hammple forgot about a friend like him. So, he chased Hammple around, in an attempt to kill his legs. It was at about this point Hammple remembered his kitchen whisk, and, using it with unparalleled skill and grace, he cut BOT's liver off. However, then, all the aliens became enraged, and chased him around. After about 3 hrs of running, Hammple stole a spaceship, and returned to Earth. Now safe on earth, hammple thought everything would be fine. BUT IT WASN'T!!! BOT's small-bunny counterparts on earth where attacking! They had used thier animal mind communication to hear BOT in his final cry of OUCH! as hammple cut his liver off. They were going to get revenge! Hammple could only watch, as a tital wave of bunnies hit him, and ate him. He was now in 100 little pieces, which the bunnies ate. What could he do now?

(5) He re-assembelled himself, he's still a zombie from last time. He started to fight back, but the bunnies were too powerful for him. They knocked him out, and carried him to their mystical cheese factory, where he was to be made into fried cheese. At the thought of fried cheese, Goatee Guy immediately inspected the factory to make sure it was moldy. He did this because if it wasn't moldy, it cure the BOT's liver! Always remember this readers: On one foggy night in Nigeria, a doctor once said: Eat fried cheese, it's good for your liver!. Suddenly, Goatee Guy realized the Bunnies' evil scheme; The evil Bunnies were going to turn Hammle into fried cheese, and feed him to BOT, so that BOT's liver would be healed, and he could finally DESTROY HAMMPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Unfortunately, Goatee Guy's pathetic attempts to stop this failed, and BOT was healed. BOT then realized that he couldn't destroy Hammple because he had already eaten him, but luckily, Hammple's brother, Nammple, was there to take on BOT. And so, the great battle between Nammple and BOT BEGAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Nammple called on his friend, Murrow the cat, who brought his owner, Ian along. It was three against one, but they realized that the BOT was much bigger then them. The only solution was Ian pressed a button, and Murrow transformed into... Muriow! He used his hairball fireballs to shoot the BOT, but BOT took out his SUPER HAIRSPRAY and put out the fireballs. Then he realized that hairspray was flammable and was blown up in a big, firelry ball, that was visable from space.

(6) Then the alien came and said Congratulations! You are now a member of the AFLAC! But, it wasn't Hammple he was talking about, it was Murrow. Hammple got upset and {Lonestar posted while Sporlo was writing... Sporlo said:} Unfortuneatly, even though BOT meant Bunny of Terror, it also meant that BOT was a roBOT! BOT was a hunk of metal! Fire was a worthless offense! Which one do we continue off of?!?! Thought Hammple. If they couldn't figure it out soon, they'd have to use Sporlo's, and use come back to Lonestar's after a bit! Yay! A perfect compromise! Then Murrow got extremly pissed, and so did Ian, so they both killed Sporlo and Hammple in rage. Ian killed Sporlo with no problem, but Murrow couldn't kill Hammple because he was a zombie cat, so they dropped a nuclear bomb on him, so all the peices would be blown away too far away from each other to regenerate. Then Sporlo simply became invincible and did not die. Sporlo then got angry that this whole story is now completely messed up. Sporlo decided to buy Ian a new bird. Ian thanked Sporlo for the new parakeet, which he named Birdie Num Num. Birdie Num Num flew up and crapped on Sporlo's head. Sporlo then got angry and killed Birdie Num Num. Then Sporlo bought Ian a new whale. A really big one. A blue one. In revenge for killing the cute bird, Birdie Num Num, the whale landed on top of Sporlo, flattening him. Sporlo declared war against Ian. They each had armies. On Ian's side, there was Muriow, the Whale, Zombie Birdie Num Num, The Cheat Commandoes, PooperTroopers, the MSG god, God, Buddy the Chao, Lemur, Mousey, 1000 cows with guns, and Hammple, which Ian stitched back together. On Sporlos side there was the kitchen whisk. And so, the great war between Sporlo and Ian.............BEGINS!!!


(7) Sporlo, before attacking, decided to buy Ian 10,000 new machine guns as a belated birthday present. Then, Sporlo extended the whisk towards Ian's army, and destroyed it with a single sweep. It was the power of the Noglingy Forjent that was contained inside that whisk, and when used by its creator, it could do ANYTHING! So, the great war ended and Sporlo revived Hammple with the power of the Noglingy Forjent, and bought Ian two new night caps. Then Sporlo gave Ian $999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999,999.
Then technostick noticed that Tech Geek actually created the thread. Tech Geek jumped in and used his powers to blow Sporlo up. However, he accidentally tripped over a Lady Bug and dropped the rocket engine. It ignited, flew to the moon, blew up the moon, and then turned into a night cap. Sporlo asked if he could buy that cap for Ian. Someone said yes. So, Sporlo bought Ian a new night cap and mailed it to him. Then Tech Geek, unharmed, decided to delete this thread. Unfortunately, the dead and gruesome remains of Ian's army were just too much for TG. So TG vomitted on his pet cat. The vomit then made the cat morph into a Purple Dragon. Matan's IRD (Isreali Red Dragon) then challenged TG's PD (Purple Dragon). So, the great battle between IRD and PD BEGAN!

(8) MY Purple dragon called the EHMAZIF (Emergency Howler Monkey and Zeus Impersonator Force) who promptly killed IRD! Matan got so mad he modified a cattle prod using his extreme MBG skills to control PD to kill me. I stopped Pd just in time, and I bought Ian a new box of cereal. Then He ripped out his splene! A drop of Blood feel from hample into Luke's(Who Randomly Appeared) Mounth. The Blood burned through Luke's Esophigus and Blew him Up (Yahhhh). Hample Said to Ian That his feet were orange too. Then a big cow feel from the sky and squashed hample's butt. Matan walked up licking a lolly pop and said We need more levels like this. Why don't we make this the next community group level. Robot-Marble Grew 4 times bigger with his Supper Grow and used his Teleport to move the cow to sisilly where it feel on and killed 2 unsuspecting tourist Who just happened to be Luke SkyWalker and Obi Wan. Then The Dominion came and the Jem'Hadar Slaughtered everybody. The Founders Went to the beach and started sunbathing.

(9) Then an Enormous venemous snake came and bit someone. That person was Ian because he wasn't following the rules about actually contributing and not saying extraneous things. Then Sporlo bought Ian a new bird named Birdie Nom Nom. He Was killed by Sporlo. Then Ian came in and said This story is just getting way too confusing. It started with RMs confusing post, and the next two posts by Sporlo were just as confusing, and this just sucks. I'm using my time machine to travel back to when I got Birdie Num Num but before he got killed by Sporlo, and escape from this madness. Ian steps into his time machine, and travels back to when he got Birdie Num Num. There, he saw Sporlo giving him to another Ian, so Ian snatched Birdie Num Num away from Ian and ran off. However, while he was running, Lonestar Bumped into Ian. Lonestar exclaimed, Whoa! Cool Bird! Can I kill it? Ian replied saying, No, but you can kill Birdie Nom Nom. So LS slit BNNom's throat and paid Ian a Billion Dollars! Then suddenly, Sporlo asked Lonestar to do a good job making a vid out of this. He also asked when the Noglingy Forjent would be finished. Lonestar, in reply, Morphed into a cowboy and moved to the Wild Wild West. Even more suddenly, Ian decided to skip this whole story and Travel into the distant FUTURE. So he did. In the future, where everything that was mentioned earlier didn't exist, Ian decided to see what kind of TV they have in the future. He used the couple billion dollars Lonestar and Sporlo had given him to buy a big house, a mile-long TV, and a new iMacG12. It was awesome.

(10) While he was out-and-about, window shopping for some kind of hoverboard/flying car, he ran in to Lonestar the 34th! Lonestar's great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great- great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great-great grandson! They decided to train Birdie Num Num to use laser eyes to zap anyone who tries to kill him again. Then, out of nowhere, came a despicable creature called al gore who tried to trick Birdie Num Num into believing that manbearpig was nearby, and so Birdie Num Num used his laser eyes to kill Al Gore. Then he had a feast of Sunflower seeds! It was delicious. Then they saw somebody. It looked like a robot cat. It was Future Hammple! He said, You forgot me! I had to wait 9,872 years! The first 1000 years were the worst. The third 1000 years I was arrested for a crime I didn't do. I was in jail for the next 5000 years. Then they let me out. And now I am really angry he said. So he reached out with his arms, which morphed into laser cannons because he now had robotic body parts, and shot a ball of energy, which killed everyone except for Birdie Num Num. Birdie Num Num chirped with delight and perched himself on Hammple's shoulder, who declared: Its MY story now Hammple walked towards a mountain in the distance and told Birdie Num Num all about how he was in jail for 1000 years because he WAS guilty. He explained to Birdie Num Num how he vowed revenge on AFLAC for not allowing him to become a member, and stole the kitchen whisk, later using it and a horde of noodles he had recruited to wage war on AFLAC. He won but was eventually arrested and lost his whisk. Birdie Num Num didn't seem t understand but was content on Hammple's shoulder. They got to the mountain and then mutant mice kidnapped Hammple, and kept him in their underground prison, which was guarded by a Monkey, who had a deadly nunchuk in his hand. Then, the mutant mice kidnapped the Robot/Future Hammple, and took him to the prison as well. Future Hammple was placed in the same room as the Present Hammple


(11) The ghost of Ian came down from heaven. He saw Future Hammple and grabbed Birdie Num Num. Hammple said Hey! Give him back! Ian shook his head and sayed No. I want him to survive. What do you mean? said Hammple. Then, the temperature started to go up. Very high. Over 250 degrees. People fled from the city below, which was melting. The sky turned a hazy red. The people screamed The main cooling machine broke! We're all doomed! Then Birdie Num Num remembered something: GLOBAL WARMING! Ian took Birdie Num Num up to heaven where he would be safe, and Future Hammple, being made with metal, started to melt. NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!! he cried. When he was nothing but a puddle of liquid metal. R.Stanley fell out of a combustion toaster. He put the liquid metal in the freezer, then it turned into a giant Luke. Then R.Stanley (who was now spitting toast out his eye) said: IS THAT RANDOMNESS OR WHAT?!?!?!?!? and melted. Aww, CRAP! I didn't mean for that to happen! The giant Luke Immediately disappeared before TG came and scolded everyone for saying his name. While rstanley was a puddle of melted user, he began to flow down the hill, into the grass field, which was now on fire. He died a horrible death. Oh wait, he died when he melted. Howerver, the giant Luke was still alive. Suddenly, Ian and Birdie Num Num came down from the heavens and zapped the giant Luke. Luke turned into a puddle of melted user, and flowed down the hill, into the grass field, just like rstanley. However, the two melted puddles of giant Luke and rstanley merged together, and turned into Luke R. Stanley!!!

(12) R.Stanley said Wait. Luke's a bitch. He then separated from Luke. He then cracked Luke's metal buttocks with a hammer. Then the EHMAZIF returned! They celebrated the 4 page point with melted Hammple and R.Stanley. However, back up in heaven, Hammple and R.Stanley appeared, because they died. Ian and Birdie Num Num greated them. Then Hammple had a terrible thought... they turned around and saw the army of multiple account lukes that they defeated before! They were outnumbered. But they noticed something else. The devil came and dragged the Lukes down to hell instead. However, the lukes grabbed Hammple, R.Stanley, Ian and Birdie Num Num, and they were dragged down to hell too! Then, Joshua Dallman came back and banned all the lukes again. Just like before, Everyone had a huge party, but this time at the disco/casino/chinese restraunt! Everyone stuffed themselves with chinese food, (especially Ian) and they created a statue of Joshua Dallman in honor of banning luke. Everyone had a great time. Then they noticed something. They just ate chinese food. The MSG god came and killed them all.



In heaven, Hammple, Ian, Sprolo, Birdie Num Num and the rest were hanging around as Ian pulled out another bird. This is Elvis. We got him about a week ago in real life. And put him next to Birdie Num Num. But then the two birds started to ian the pig. Ian, being offended by this verb of his name, says OMG POST SO IT MAKES SENCE!!!!! and punched TG in the face. Elvis and Birdie Num Num then started to run away with each other and Tech geek, still in pain from Ian's face punch, watches them elope. He then walks up to them and wonder's why they are eloping. Hammple then noticed that it's most likely that they're both boys. So Hammple screamed and slapped them both. Ian then got angry and told Birdie Num Num to use the lazer eyes he was tought earlier. He zapped Hammple, and god, who would not tolerate this violence in heaven, sent everyone to hell! There they met Mr. Big Shoe, who asked them if they wanted to meet Mr. Weight, they said yes so he kicked them all towards Mr. Weight who told slang maybe he shouldn't post as much. He fell on slang, crushing him, then noticed Ian posted a lot too, so he called upon Zeegy H. Bomb who exclaimed Zeegy Boogy Doog! and caused a nuclear explosion, which has a strange reaction on Ian, making him only allowed to speak in smileys!

Then the ghost of Ross's dead guinea pig walked in and bit Ian's toe. The Guinea Pig Ghost then walked off towards a Dock over Lava.

Sporlo then says: dood Ian, this is getting old. 2 is PLENTY! besides, I did not give TG permission for the 2nd one or you for the 3rd one. I'm not objecting to these threads, i'm just saying that you didn't bother to ask.

Ian then replied and got sad:

After the topic was locked, the defences went down, and the core of the Noglingy Forjent was destroyed by a tribe of savage mentally mutated racoons, and the Noglingy Forjent became no more.

THE END!!!!!



There, now that is the ENTIRE story. Truly a legendary thing, isn't it? Matan or technostick, could you please sticky this? BTW, I had to double post, cause the whole thing couldn't fit into one post. The whole story is about 29, 500 characters long.
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01 Feb 2007 05:07 #3 by Ian
Stickied. I will now move all other Noglingy Forjent stuff (except the video thread) to the rubbish bin.
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01 Feb 2007 05:33 #4 by Ian
Done. Aaah, this was so good while it lasted. Also, I got the mentally mutated racoons idea from a dream I had. Want me to post it?
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16 Feb 2007 01:15 #5 by Sporlo
Replied by Sporlo on topic Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story
Matan, you still haven't moved the original threads out of the rubbish bin.
(no rush. or actually rush. or actually do it now. yea. i cant wait)
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16 Feb 2007 01:18 #6 by Ian
We don't need the original threads anymore, now that we have this.
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16 Feb 2007 02:24 #7 by Sporlo
Replied by Sporlo on topic Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story
they will be locked and it is better to see the original to see WHO posted what and it is funnier that way.


hmmmmmm...
isnt it weird how Ian and I dont really get along that well? We got angry at each other in Hammple the Cat V.2 and we always disagree............ hmmmmmmmmmmm...
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17 Feb 2007 06:14 #8 by Skiiz
Yeah, that's a good idea.
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27 Feb 2007 03:20 #9 by Ian
Quote:they will be locked and it is better to see the original to see WHO posted what and it is funnier that way.


hmmmmmm...
isnt it weird how Ian and I dont really get along that well? We got angry at each other in Hammple the Cat V.2 and we always disagree............ hmmmmmmmmmmm...

Hmm... maybe.

Just so you know, I did not make your horoscope the worst one on purpose!
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12 Mar 2007 22:44 #10 by Sporlo
Replied by Sporlo on topic Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story
Matan, u still havent brought back the originals...
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13 Mar 2007 03:24 #11 by Skiiz
Why does he need to?
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13 Mar 2007 14:03 #12 by Sporlo
Replied by Sporlo on topic Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story
he doesnt, i just want him to.
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16 Mar 2007 00:30 #13 by Sporlo
Replied by Sporlo on topic Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story
Never mind. I'm MotD and I moved all 3
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16 Mar 2007 01:40 #14 by Pablo
Enjoy being MotD while you still can! -hint lol
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16 Mar 2007 03:01 #15 by IsraeliRD
Replied by IsraeliRD on topic Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story
Wait, what just happened? I never got a PM or anything and definitely didn't look in this place for ages.


Quote:In his desperate attempt to get them back, he realized that he had only moved them to the rubbish bin. He wanted to get them back, but Matan said he had to write a 732 page essay on why.

STICK TO THE TRUTH, IT WAS 843 PAGES!

"matan, now i get what you meant a few years back when you said that "the level in mbg is beyond me" after the last rampage i noticed things were insane, and now i truly feel that too" - Dushine, 2015.
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16 Mar 2007 03:20 #16 by Sporlo
Replied by Sporlo on topic Noglingy Forjent/Hammple the Cat FULL Story
Quote:Yea I'll do that, but the threads are locked and I'll let staff members know not to post there (ill have to post there first though lol).



The rubbish bin should never be deleted off its contents. It's forum history and I also need it for browsing.

Straight from you PM. I'm not sure if your above post was sarcastic or not, but I have proof of permission. Well YOU were going to do, but the point is that you would ALLOW it.
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